"It's easy but hard, you know."

In my last post I wrote about one of the lessons I learned from working with wonderful translators in Panama. I had the amazing opportunity to work with two brilliant Panamanians, and I greatly miss both of them. While they may not know it, each of them taught me something that I will carry with me for the rest of my life. It's funny how a short story or sentence can redirect one's thought process in a monumental way. The following quote did just that, and caused me to ponder long and hard about being a missionary.

"It's easy but hard, you know."

That is what S. said me when we were talking about reaching out where we are placed. A simple little phrase that holds a lot truth. Every time that I have the chance to serve, the fact that God picked me to represent Him, makes me feel extremely special; yet there are many times that I will talk myself out of an opportunity that He puts in front of me. Why is it that even with God's love as motivation, His work is so hard to do? As children of God, one would think that it would be easy to do the things that please Him. I feel that I should be bursting at the seams to share the wonderful gift that I have, and yet I often don't. I'm not the only one who has been in this predicament. In Romans 7, Paul describes his struggle: "For what I want to do I do not do, but what I had I do...So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me." Here Paul, successfully illustrates what the life of a prisoner to sin looks like. A constant war raging within, and we have no control over it. Sadly, it is our nature to be slaves to sin, and thus targets of God's wrath (Ephesians 2:3b). Here we are, humans - created to worship and glorify God, and yet we have chosen to let sin corrupt us so that we are no longer able to do what we were created for!

Thank goodness God chose not to leave us in this hopeless state. If fact, our God is so amazing that He has given us everything we need to live a godly life! (2 Peter 1:3-4) I can't wrap my mind around how awesome our God is!

Lost in Translation

My dear readers, I must once again apologize for the great length of time between my posts. My life has been rather busy, but is other wise going well. It has been just over three months since I have returned from Panama, and I still think about my time there constantly. Many of you have asked for another post on my experiences there, so I am going to take the next few lines on this page sharing my favorite object lesson from my trip.

As I worked with and among the different peoples of Panama, I encountered three different languages; Spanish, Kuna and Wounaan. This meant that I had the privilege of working with several wonderful translators (because my spanish is horribly rusty).  If you have ever been in a situation in which you needed to rely on a translator, you know what a wonderful partnership and working experience it can be. Looking back, I feel that I communicated better when I was speaking through a translator, than how I do speaking on my own. The language barrier forced me to employ every form on communication, body language, good annunciation, strong listening and full concentration on what was being said. Even with all my efforts, the translators did most of the work. Their work started long before I met them, for they had to build up a vocabulary in two and sometimes three languages and their work continued for they were conscious of their role, always placing themselves where they could listen most effectively.

It is through these observations of how good translators work, I learned more about my role as a translator for God.  The question, 'Am I listening to God in such a way that I will be ready to translate what He says to me to the people He brings into my life in a way that they would understand?' is haunting and leads to many more questions. First of all, what kind of vocabulary and qualities am I building up in myself? 1 Peter 1:5-8 gives a list of qualities (faith, goodness, knowledge, self-control, perseverance, godliness, brotherly kindness and love) that we should do everything in our power to gain in increasing amounts, because they will keep us from being ineffective and unproductive in our knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. Secondly,  am I effectively listening to God? As a college student, I have become very good at 'bearly' listening. Sometimes I go to class and the only part of the lecture I remember is what followed the phase "This will be on the test". It's bad to think that I do that with some of my classes, but it's really scary to think that I do that with God.

I was reading Habakkuk today, and in the second chapter, verse one, Habakkuk states, "I will stand my watch and station myself on the ramparts; I will look to see what he will say to me, and what answer I am to give to this complaint." In chapter one, Habakkuk basically gave God a long list of complains, and then sat down and waited for God to answer. The first verse of chapter two really stuck out to me because I can think of many times I have complained to God, but then went on with my life, and didn't stick around to wait for an answer.  Habakkuk not only waited for an answer, but he placed himself in the 'watchtower' the best position possible to receive God's message.

Cuts deep, doesn't it? To realize that the message God has for me and others may be getting lost in translation. Can I afford to listen halfheartedly? The answer is no. I must see myself as a watchman, earnestly listening, eagerly awaiting for God to speak to me.